The Scribbler is fortunate to have Ann Knight as the featured guest this week. She has studied Dramatic Arts as well as Dramatic Screenwriting at Algonquin College and received an outstanding achievement award in English Language. She is a published author with a Young Adult story - The Rubix. She has also penned The Rising (2011), Midnight Peak - a sequel(2011) and Battlefield (2011) Her link is below.
Her short story The Raft is a creative piece about inner turbulence in the aftermath of a traumatic event.
Copyright 2015 by Ann Knight
All rights reserved, including the right of
reproduction in whole or in part in any form. Used by permission.
The
Raft
Thunderheads rolled across the
darkened sky. Gray clouds swelled and curled over themselves spewing rain that
fell in tight streaks, lacerating the surface of the ocean that lay beneath
like needles puncturing skin. This storm had caught me completely by surprise. After
the worst of it had passed, I was alone in the squally waters fighting to stay
alive, desperately clutching the only object that was keeping me afloat—a simple
box crate. I didn’t know what had happened to the rest of my family—the storm had
separated us. My husband, my children, my pets—the people I loved—where were they?
They were in the blackness like me—maybe they were alone and holding onto
something for dear life just like me too.
I had already been at the mercy of this tumultuous sea for what seemed
like a time without end and it was still raging and still powerful. A black wall
of water rose in front of me, sucking me into it like a vacuum. I found myself
at its highest peak, momentarily gazing at the bowling sky above until the wave
dropped me back down so fast that bile came up from my stomach and burned the
back of my throat. This was the roller coaster from hell—the dips plunged my heart
into the pit of my gut until I thought the sick feeling alone would be enough
to kill me. The violence of the sea was relentless. I curled my hand around the
rope that was tied around the box crate, doubting that I could remain afloat
much longer. My strength was all but gone. Hanging onto the winding rope, I ignored
the frigid temperature of the water, endured the occasional slaps from the wild
salty sea, and thought back to a time when I had navigated these depths with
ease. It didn’t even seem like that long ago when…
The clear sky was above me and the calm sea was below me. My vessel was
large, I remember it well. It was sturdy, beautiful, and it weathered the
storms that came my way. I had spent a long time building it—constructing its
base and overseeing the minutest of details until it was sail-worthy. I had
placed everything that mattered to me on that craft; everything of substance that this particular storm brutally tore to pieces
had been on that vessel—pieces I had tried to hold on to, but the tempest
had swallowed them all.
The swell rose, heaving, and tossing me around. This night was especially
dark, as black as coal. The occasional sparkle of light on the water, when the
clouds decided to be kind and part, was somewhat reassuring. I wanted to think
that even though I was alone—stranded—maybe someone was looking out for me—just
maybe… I wasn’t completely abandoned. I rested my cheek on the crate. My teeth were
chattering and my body was shivering uncontrollably. I gripped the slippery
rope tighter, twirling it around my hand several times. If the storm took this crate
from me too I wouldn’t survive. I needed it. It hadn’t been a part of my original
vessel—but it was a part of my experience now. It had found me and kept me
afloat—it was all I had to hold onto. It would mean the end if I lost my grip—because
the way I saw it, without this crate I would drown. It wasn’t just a simple box
crate. It was my lifeline. Even in the dark I could make out its shape, square
and imperfect, but in my view it was just right… because it had saved me.
Wrapping my arms around the crate, I desperately clung for dear life. But
the shift of my weight submerged us, and we slipped under the surface. The
water swallowed us both. There in the cold depth, we were rocked and tossed,
rolled and churned—me and my crate—until the rope disentangled itself from my
hand. We were disconnected. I screamed underwater and bubbles rushed out of my
mouth. Flailing and kicking, I reached for the rope that wasn’t there anymore. Disoriented
and confused, I struggled to find the surface—needing to get air into my
burning lungs.
A ghostly white light shone down from a break in the cover of clouds
overhead, like a spotlight, and it showed me the way. Breaking the surface of
the sea, I choked and struggled to tread water, coughing and spitting until
something knocked me hard on the back of the head. It was my crate—and it was floating
away from me. The sea was taking it. It’s
leaving… I panicked and
opened my mouth to call after it just as a succession of small waves began to batter me. I flailed at the surface of the choppy water, fighting for my next breath, knowing I had no strength left to go on. Knowing I should let the storm take me because I had lost too much—more than most—and more than I could ever hope to recover.
opened my mouth to call after it just as a succession of small waves began to batter me. I flailed at the surface of the choppy water, fighting for my next breath, knowing I had no strength left to go on. Knowing I should let the storm take me because I had lost too much—more than most—and more than I could ever hope to recover.
I went under.
The water covered me like a cold, discomforting blanket. I expected
death to claim me, as I knew it was waiting and longing to do. The tendrils of
the deep reached for me, bucking and summersaulting me around and around. The
rage and tenacity of the water spurred my own anger and I lashed out with furious
fists, and sharp kicks, and everything I could muster—fighting the bodiless
monsoon until my lungs screamed for oxygen. Exhausted, I opened my mouth and
released the last of my air supply. The bubbles quickly rose for the surface,
showing me the way up. I contemplated staying put. I need air! My lungs screamed again. But in this very moment the
water was still; deceptively quiet and eerily tranquil like it was on pause. Just take me… I thought. Without so much as a thin thread to hold on
to, I’m defeated anyhow.
Just then a raft appeared overhead, its shadow darkening the blue-black
gloom. I looked up at the rectangular mass, temporarily mesmerized, until white
hands broke the surface of the water and reached in. Those hands found me,
curled around my upper arms, and pulled me out of the water. My lungs sucked in
a desperate breath of air, all the while cursing me for allowing their
extensive distress. My upper body landed on the hard planks. The soaked wood
smelled of over-ripened apples and cheap cigars and my cheek was pressed firmly
against it. My legs dangled off the side of the raft, tethered in place by the
weight of my upper body. I couldn’t keep my eyes open because the water came up
over the side of the raft and slapped my face over and over, developing a
rhythm, like the beat of a drum. The slapping water gradually lessened in
intensity until I realized that…
The storm was finally beginning to settle.
By morning, the sky was violet and blue. A stripe of orange peaked over
the edge of the horizon where the ocean met the sky. The orange streak slowly
spread across the dull sky, lightening and trying to overtake it. I took a deep
breath, vaguely aware that I was not alone on the raft. My fingers found the
edge of the plank above my head and I used the very little strength I had left
to turn on to my other cheek. With my mouth gaping, I stared across at the
familiar figure sitting just a few feet away. He had the appearance of a man,
but I knew he was still a boy.
The salty water burned my eyes but I could see his shoes—white sneakers
with bright green laces. They were familiar. My head was swarming with thoughts
and ideas. The boy was sitting crossed-legged, his gray plaid cotton shorts
revealing his long pale legs. There was something about him that I recognized,
yet I couldn’t quite identify it. The misshaped form of his knees struck me. The
bones slightly protruded beneath his kneecaps… This boy… can it be that I know him? I wondered. The raft was drifting
on the choppy sea, but in the moment that I was staring across at the boy,
everything felt peaceful. I opened my mouth, wanting to say something, but I
was too exhausted to utter anything that made sense. “I… I can’t…” my voice
broke and I hung my head.
“Don’t try,” he said clearly, and I knew his voice. I had heard it before.
“Just rest.”
I squeezed my eyes shut. Pain constricted about my chest. My heart tightened
around a small chest—a secret box that I kept hidden deep inside—a chest that
now threatened to burst open. Pain mingled with my blood and pulsed through my
veins like poison, becoming a hot and searing liquid. I bit down on my lip
until the taste of blood filled my mouth. There
was a boy on my raft—a boy. And suddenly I realized… this wasn’t just a
raft—it was a piece of my broken vessel.
This had once been mine… I swallowed hard, trying to push down the lump that
had risen to my throat. I couldn’t look up at the boy now even if I wanted to… because
I knew exactly what I would see if I did—hair as fine as strands of silk, dark
espresso-coloured eyes that could see to the pit of someone’s soul, and a smile
that could brighten even the deepest, darkest of days. On top of that though, I would
see perfection. I would see the reflection of my joy, of my hope, and my endless
love.
“Don’t try,” he repeated, and his voice took me back to a different
time.
There had been a boy on my vessel—before this particular storm hit. He
was a strong, handsome, caring boy. A boy that I
loved unconditionally. He left handprints on my heart and placed a trail of footprints throughout my soul. A sob broke free of my chest. My eyes were stinging, not from the saltiness of the water, but from the saltiness of the tears that were now flowing freely from them.
loved unconditionally. He left handprints on my heart and placed a trail of footprints throughout my soul. A sob broke free of my chest. My eyes were stinging, not from the saltiness of the water, but from the saltiness of the tears that were now flowing freely from them.
My heart was broken… I lost this boy to the storm.
A strong gust of wind twirled our raft around on the blue-marbled water.
My legs were still dangling over the side when the wild current caught them. The
sea tried once again to suck me back into its perilous depths. My shoulders
lost their perch and my body slid close to the edge. Not again! I thought, and contemplated the value of holding on this
time, of staying this course. What did I
have left? Do we ever actually beat the storm? No. We are all either heading
into it, in the middle of it, or coming out of it—after it has taken something
from us. My fingers were slipping. My hold was failing. The water was
swallowing my lower body and I had to make a choice—keep going or let go. The
storm was testing me again. Choose.
As if in answer, the boy reached over and placed his hand on my back.
“It’ll be ok,” he said, and I could almost see his face. “Don’t let go
mama.”
And I broke. I wept.
The water entered my mouth and I choked. I wanted to hold him—to hold
the boy, but he was beyond my reach. “Hold on,” he said. “Don’t let go,” he whispered
time and time again, and I did—I held on until the storm receded and the waters
were calm again. The boy never moved from his place. I felt him sitting next to
me, where he remained fixed and watchful.
The sky remained dull and gray for a long time, a long time. I held on, drifting half-on and half-off the raft, until
the water became a ripple-less sheet of glass under the pale blue sky. Until a new
dawn finally broke. Finally, the storm had relented. In time I found the
strength to pull myself completely up onto to the raft, and all I could do was
rest my forehead against the boards and hug my knees to my chest. I was barely
alive. The next stretch of time was for recovering, restoring, healing. I
didn’t move. I didn’t do anything but breathe. Weak and fragile, the only arms
of comfort were my own, and I just breathed. Days turned to nights. Eventually,
my ears began to work again and I heard sea birds
singing and playing in the sky overhead. Their songs were sweet, like nectar to my ears. They nurtured me. The occasional gush of water spraying from a whale’s blowhole as it came in for a curious look, startled me and helped me find the strength to lift my head again. I looked out onto the blue world, and my perspective changed. I noticed different things over time. Fins broke the surface of the water near my raft, drawing brilliant swirls that brought a smile to my lips. Life was all around me. The boy was gone. But he was with me. And life was within me. And life was all around me. The storm hadn’t taken it all…
Thank you Ann for sharing this compelling story.
Readers can discover more about Ann by going to www.annknightfiction.com
Please drop by next week for another exciting 4Q Interview.
singing and playing in the sky overhead. Their songs were sweet, like nectar to my ears. They nurtured me. The occasional gush of water spraying from a whale’s blowhole as it came in for a curious look, startled me and helped me find the strength to lift my head again. I looked out onto the blue world, and my perspective changed. I noticed different things over time. Fins broke the surface of the water near my raft, drawing brilliant swirls that brought a smile to my lips. Life was all around me. The boy was gone. But he was with me. And life was within me. And life was all around me. The storm hadn’t taken it all…
Love you forever my boy,
Ann Knight
Thank you Ann for sharing this compelling story.
Readers can discover more about Ann by going to www.annknightfiction.com
Please drop by next week for another exciting 4Q Interview.