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I had an opportunity once to visit a food bank to drop off a donation one time and the experience inspired a story. I posted this previously on the Scribbler in 2014 and I thought it might be time to re-post for your entertainment.
The "Food Bank" was originally published on commuterlit.com, as well as in the limited edition of SHORTS, Vol 3. It will be featured in an upcoming collection of short stories titled "Boxes of Memories", due for publication in the fall of 2018.
This is a comment left by a faithful reader.
Our storyteller, the maintenance worker, craftily draws his readers through the doors of the food bank. Once inside, we cannot help but feel the author’s varying emotions. And we soon discover his deep compassion towards the less fortunate members of our society. It makes for a good read. Very poignant, specially during this holiday season of festivities, excess and abundance.
(Paul Chiasson)
The Food Bank
Food
is a necessary staple of everyone’s life. Because of that I toss my
loose change in an old cookie jar daily, a bust of Woody Woodpecker I
bought in a yard sale, sans cover. Stationed on my night table
by the lamp he faces the closet; the ceramic peeping-tom watches me
change my clothes all the time. At the end of each month, he and I
probably save up sixteen to twenty dollars. Whoopee! But today is
cause for celebration; I counted this month’s take after breakfast
and found a couple of misplaced toonies for an all time high of
$23.44. I am elated. There will be eight more Mr. Noodles to dole
out.
Today’s
my day off, Wednesday, the end of January only one day away. My to-do
list lying on the kitchen table nags at me, do these, do that, do
this, do that, but I grab the pencil sitting next to it and tick off
number one, “Donation time!!!!” The Maritime Megamart with over
two acres of supreme shopping pleasure is where I’m headed.
It’s not far so I decide to walk. I retrieve my wool pea jacket
from the closet, gloves from the basket on the upper shelf, boots
from the rack. Just before I’m ready to leave, I remember the
frosty abstract art on my bedroom window. It’s likely colder than
it looks I think, deciding to use a scarf. A Tip Top Tailors suit
hanger holds a bevy of colored wraps, snaked about each other; the
brightest and flowered ones belong to my wife. I opt for my favorite
grey and black checkered one pulling it from the tangled mess. When I
do so, a beige scarf falls to the floor.
I’d
almost forgotten about it. It belongs to my son. It’s thick and
dotted with flecks of dark brown, if it was stretched open it would
read, “Burton” in orange letters. He won a bunch of gear in a
snowboarding competition four winters ago. There had been two
identical scarves, he gave one to me. I don’t know where mine is
now, I gave it away. The memory it evokes is forceful and gives me
shivers; the irony of finding it today causes bumps about my flesh. I
have to sit down, my mind races with the memory of my first and only
visit to the Food Bank. It was the end of January three years ago
that this ritual began.
I
work in the maintenance department at the Jollywell Hospital. Every
year since I’ve been there, our department puts out bins in the
lunchroom at the first of December to be filled with non perishable
food items. Not for Christmas as our supervisor explained, every one
gives for Christmas, we would give ours in January when it was needed
more, made sense to me. Someone taped a loose leaf to the side of one
bin. It was a bit crooked with nicely shaped letters from a black
marker, “For the Homeless and Hungry.” The bold lines were a
revelation for me, I’d never been hungry; as my ample girth would
suggest because I’m a bit overweight. I bought more. I even
volunteered to deliver the bins. Sometimes I wish I hadn’t.
Manoeuvring
four overloaded blue receptacles into my Ford wagon early one
Saturday morning around eight, I set out with the elation of doing a
good deed, of representing my co-workers, of benevolence. It took me
some time to find the building, it wasn’t well marked, which seemed
odd at first but I realized a fancy sign wasn’t important. The
main building ran parallel to the street, curved sheets of corrugated
steel formed walls and ceiling, crusted snow lie in some troughs, the
virgin white softening the dull galvanized grey. A smudged and dented
garage door about twelve feet wide on the left faces the road, the
entryway of patched asphalt is neatly shoveled free of snow and ice.
A cleared walkway leads to an extension, an add-on with a gable end
facing the street, it looks like a store front except it has no
window, only a dark green door, a lighted doorbell the shape of an
angel, black four-inch high digits that said 41 and a white sign the
size of a license plate, which I couldn’t read from the driveway
but I knew it said The House of Plenty.
I
backed my car up to the building, off to one side. There were neither
windows nor any sign of entrance around the garage door; the whole
building had an air of anonymity. I saw a few cars, older models,
parked in front along the street. Two men, separate from each other,
were on the other side of the roadway having a smoke. A shopping cart
from a local grocer stood alone near the walkway entrance, it was
rusted in spots, had a missing front wheel. I could see that it
contained mostly returnables, some poor man’s daily wages I
thought.
The
door squeaked a little as I opened it, an early warning system maybe.
I pushed my way in with my rump, carrying the bin to enter a dimly
lit room. Directly in front of me, six feet away, was a wall
extending ten feet to the right. The balance of the room stretched
out towards the rear for about twenty feet where there were people
waiting. The only thing that matched the low wattage of the bare
overhead bulbs was the look on the faces I encountered. It was too
quiet. My good cheer vanished like the rabbit in the hat. I rudely
stared at the small crowd, my curiosity so intense when I realized
these people were here for food. I had come in the wrong door.
The
area made an attempt to be bright; white benches along two walls,
dark brown fabric padding the seats, the pale blue walls too
institutional for me. The temperature was just below comfortable; no
one took off their jackets. A faint scent of Lysol was the only
welcoming feature. No one spoke, most were just studying me. I
wondered what they must be thinking; am I some kind of saviour, am I
just a good guy or maybe they resent that I can give, instead of ask
for, I can’t tell. None of the expressions change. The only sound
was when some of the standing in the back shuffled and a floorboard
squeaked.
My
eyes focused on a woman at the front of the bench closest to me. She
was bundled in a pink ski jacket decorated with long use. Her
disappointed face was wrapped with a white scarf in stark contrast to
her coat because of its newness. Perched on her lap of tight jeans
was a small girl of perhaps four whose hooded coat was neat and pink
also. The child’s head rested on her mother’s breast, her little
body, only clad in faded jeans and sneakers, shivered slightly in the
coolness of the room. I had to look away, it was too sad. I quickly
eyeballed the remaining patrons.
They‘re
about equal of both genders, more middle-aged than young, all of them
too thin. I recognized the older man that sits in the back on the
floor; I’d seen him many times downtown trying to be polite as he
asked strangers for some change. He wraps his many coated arms about
his drawn up knees. Four or five plastic bags squat at his feet like
trained pets, probably everything he owns. His head and beard are
grizzly grey, unkempt and stringy. I have no idea how old he is nor
his name. I doubt he’s going to be able to carry away much when I
realize he’s here for the warmth, it’s a line up he won’t get
thrown out of.
The
two young men that sit on the bench to my right, I can only think of
them as punks, are out of place; like that joke about an NAACP tee
shirt at a Klan gathering. Open jackets reveal tattoos on their
necks. The flames and trident’s make me suspect they’ve been in
jail. They stare at the floor. I try not to judge them but with both
wearing new clothes, I want to throw them out.
Farther
along the same bench sits an elderly woman. When I meet her eyes she
haughtily turns them away. Her cheeks are too red from an abundance
of blush, the rouge unable to brighten the pale, creased skin. A
burgundy pillbox hat like the one Jackie Kennedy used to wear, is
pinned neatly to her head. A luxurious fur coat bundles her slight
torso. She wears black silky gloves with gemstones crested upon the
back. Hat and coat are about fifty years old from my best estimate,
the gloves, I’m not sure but they’re shabby too. She lifts her
chin. I’m struck by the pride I witness in her bearing. I
understand what the posture means; the neat, aging costume tells me
she wasn’t always poor.
I
try and focus on my mission; this wavering of feelings is unsettling.
Setting the container on the floor I address a man that stands to my
left in the corner. He’s chest level with a sliding panel that
looks about twenty inches high and three feet wide on the wall in
front of me. I try on my best smile.
“Where
would I take this... this bin?”
I
feel guilty somehow about saying food or donation.
The
man was bearded and wore workman’s clothes, clean but worn. His
somber face seemed kind as he nodded the peak of his John Deere hat
at the buzzer to the left of the sliding door. It was unlit and
painted the same blue as the wall, playing find me if you can, I
hadn’t noticed it.
“Thanks”
I said and thumbed the switch. I had to wait a few minutes. I’m
usually a talker in a crowd but there didn’t seem anything proper
to say; people didn’t come here to meet people. My thinking was
disturbed by the cautious opening of the white colored panel. I was
confounded by the image it exposed; so much that I didn’t respond
to the opener’s presence or request. The portal was like a
television set in the wall, the scene so different to the room that I
was in. It was brightly lit with shelves of various cans, boxes and
bags of food along the walls I could see. People were scurrying about
with armfuls of items, others sorting them on tables. They were
joking and laughing. I looked quickly around embarrassed at first by
the sounds of merriment next door but then I thought, why not? I
guessed that these workers are volunteers, people unselfish of their
time; they’re not hungry so why shouldn’t they be content. It
just seemed so odd, the imbalance of emotions, the uneven see-saw of
have and have-nots. My amazement was shorted when a loud voice
suggested.
“We’ll
only be open at ten.”
I
was momentarily taken aback thinking he mistook me for a requester. I
frowned at the older man; he was bald with white fringes overlapping
his small ears. Round silver framed glasses were stuck on the end of
his nose. He had a silver bushy moustache. He lifted his matching
brows in question. I pointed to the container at my feet.
“I
have some bins from the Jollymore, where would you like me to take
them.”
His
can’t-you-see-I’m-busy attitude changed with a thankful smile
smoothing out the man’s long face.
“Go
out to the garage door and give it a good thump or two and someone
back there will help you.”
The
cover slid back smartly, I was back in the gloom. As I was bending my
knees to pick up the bin, the toes of the little girl’s shaking
feet I see in my peripheral vision disturbs my concentration. I look
up at the trembling child. The voice is frail but flowery.
“Can
we go home soon, I’m cold Mommy”
The
woman opens her jacket and folds the ends about the little girl. She
doesn’t speak words of comfort, perhaps there are none? I’m
acutely aware of the bundle of wool and polyester around my neck with
a flash of the dozens more at home. It suddenly weighs a hundred
pounds. My son just gave it to me. I decided he’d understand,
knowing him, he’d do the same thing. Unwrapping the scarf from my
head I step towards the woman. She watches me as I extend my hand
while pointing at the wrap with my other. She reddens as she looks
me in the eyes. I only see uncertainty, nothing to do with the scarf.
She accepts my gift to hastily twist it about her daughter’s lower
body.
The
other people are watching us and I begin to blush. I want to escape
so I don’t wait for acknowledgment. Hurrying to my bin, a stranger
conveniently opens the door to enter. I quickly dart around the man
as he shuffles in. Before the door clunks shut I hear,
“Thank
you Mister”
The
sincerity of her platitude waifs like warm breath in the nippy air,
floating, lingering for only a moment. My neck is cold. Her words
fill my heart. Pinpricks flourish along my neck and spine as I think
of the crew indoors, the hungry, misplaced and the lonely. I vowed
then to feed as many people that my skinny budget would allow. I
would never volunteer to deliver the bins again.
The End.
I hope you enjoyed this tale. Thanks for visiting the Scribbler. Please leave a comment below, would love to hear your thoughts.
If you have a chance, drop something off at your food bank.
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