4Q: This is your eighth novel Jason. Congratulations of course, but which one is your favorite and why?
"Wow sir, I almost didn't recognize you."
"That's good. Or at least I think. Do you really think this is going to fool a moose?" Dan wondered if he looked down at his clothes.
"I think the idea is for you to blend in with the scenery sir."
"Right. It's just too bad someone hasn't invented an outfit that resembles a chrome pole and some chairs. Imagine the fun I could have at the strip club."
"That reminds me sir." Martin started with a look of concern on his face. "I've had no less than six complaints already from constituents who saw you there the other night."
"Hmm. Anonymous ones no doubt."
"Yes sir. No one left a name."
"So who cares? If no one's brave enough to say who they are, they're certainly not going to appear on camera to talk about it. What's that old saying? Let him who is free of sins cast the first ballot?"
"I believe that's stone, sir."
"Yeah. Whatever. Nothing to worry about. Every one of the dancers said they were going to vote for me. And there were eight of them. Minus the six complaints and I'm still ahead by two votes."
"Oh God," Martin exhaled. "By the way sir, the premier's office called and said he'd be picking you up here shortly."
"Perfect. I'm all packed. Ready to beat around the bush. Put the moose in the noose. We should be sitting by the campfire discussing my promotion to deputy premier before the day's out."
"Just be careful, sir. I'll take care of things here while you're gone."
"Be sure to let the media know that I'm rubbing elbows with the premier on a moospedition will you? That will do wonders for my profile."
"It won't if I call it a moospedition, sir."
"Right. I know you'll come up with the proper description. And thanks for being here so early to see me off. Why in the name of god do we have to leave at this ungodly hour? Couldn't we have an afternoon excursion?"
"I think it's because the moose are more active around dawn, sir."
"I thought that was roosters."
"You see. It's like. Oh never mind, sir. It would take me too long to explain it."
"No problem. It's time to go anyways." Dan remarked as he pointed out the window to a massive SUV that was pulling up. "That's the premier's hunting truck."
"What a gas guzzler." Martin said with disgust.
"It sure is. Vehicles like that are great for the economy, Martin. They cost a fortune and use up a lot fuel. That creates tax revenue. I thought a political science major like yourself would know that."
"Except that the taxpayers paid for that vehicle and the gas that goes in it."
"Details. Details. Wish me luck, Martin." Dan said, exited the office and walked towards the bloated vehicle.
"You there!" A well-dressed man on the sidewalk stuck out his hand. "Dan Clark. I just wanted to say keep up the good work and I've convinced my entire staff to vote for you."
"Thank you, sir." Dan shook his hand. "What a great way to start the day. An early endorsement from an early riser."
"Why are you dressed in camouflage? Going to spy on the opposition?" he said with a snicker.
"No sir. But that's a good idea. Actually I'm on my way out of town to bag a moose."
"What!? Why you traitor! You told me if I voted for you, you were going to make all forms of hunting illegal. Don't you remember me?"
"Sure I do." Dan stared at him hard. "But it's still pretty dark out. And I'm not wearing my glasses."
"You didn't have any the day you came to my office."
"I'm Wally Sparks, head of the animal shelter and president of Friends of Wildlife. You said if I donated to your campaign you'd make all forms of hunting illegal!"
"I am sir, I am. I'm working on it as we speak."
"You just said you were going to bag a moose!"
"Tag a moose, Willy. Tag a moose. We're going to monitor these mammals and find out what route they're taking when they go south for the winter. If we can figure out what roads they're crossing on their migration to the southern states, we might be able to put in some animal crosswalks. Do you have any idea how many moose-related fatalities are reported each year?"
"What? That's insane?"
"Oh no, Walter. Car accidents are very serious. That's why we're driving this over-sized SUV. If a moose should jump in front of us, we're going to make sure we come out on top. So to speak. Thanks again for your contribution and don't worry sir. A vote for Dan is a vote for the moose, bears, and any other animal that you like. Leave a list with my assistant Martin. Good day to you." Dan smiled as he jumped into the SUV. "Floor it, Mr. Premier."
Thank you so much Jason for being our guest this week.